Today

Today I see my cousin, her husband and their child in Pasadena. Afterward, I head to my real home. I'm not taking mom with me. Instead I will spend a few days at home, hopefully to wrap up loose ends with the soon-to-be-ex, about staying in the house and beginning our divorce papers for real.

I believe I'll be spending New Year's alone. I've asked him if he'd like to spend time together, but he let me know that he had already made plans with his AA buddy's family. Even knowing that, I still want to be in OUR home for what may be the last New Year's for me in that "family" way even though I'll be alone. I believe this will be the first New Year's ever that "we" - meaning, me and my mom (and hubby), don't host a party. How weird but very appropos - that is life, ever-changing.

I suppose I should think of some New Year's resolutions. Why not? It's not like if they don't happen, I'll be too disappointed. I mean, c'mon, I made wedding vows and look what happened to them? And I'm not dead yet.