I Can't Believe I Didn't Write About...

I can't believe I didn't write about what happened last Sunday!

So I actually had dinner with mom. Sitting at Chili's (god awful Chili's), we're waiting for our food and she asks, "So is (hubby) disappointed in you that you can't get pregnant?"

"Huh? What? What are you asking?"

"Oh well then are you disappointed in him that you can't get pregnant?"

Tears started to well in my eyes. I wanted to scream at her. Instead with wobbly words I said, "I never even thought of that, I mean. That is just the worst thing to say. Don't say that."

Then she says, "Well maybe I'm bad luck for you - that's why you're not getting pregnant."

Again, I wanted to FU*KING SCREAM at her to shut up, but I didn't.

I told her, "Don't do that. Don't put that out into the world. Don't sit there and put another pressure on me that now I have to get pregnant so you don't think you're bad luck."

I kept repeating how what she was saying was wrong. She did apologize and we moved onto another conversation, but it's because I kept my cool. Seriously, I could have started BAWLING right there at GODDA*N Chili's.

It hurt, it hurt like hell. Of course I've had the moment pass in my mind about disappointment and even wrote about it here, but hubby has never said a thing. Always so supportive, but Jesus, to have my mom say sh*t like that, just kills me - breaks my heart, makes me feel like sh*t.